As you may know, I’ve been having trouble getting posts written and posted the past month or so. I’m not entirely sure why, but I do know that it started by just pushing too hard when ideas and words just would not come to me. In an effort to try and remedy my issue, I’m going to try to post something from a blog prompt question as often as I can. I may jump around a bit as to where the prompt comes from and I may vary the order a bit. I’m starting with Prompt #5 found on the blog Brittany, Herself. The question? If you could bring one person back from the dead, who would it be?
I’m rather fortunate in that I really don’t know a whole lot of people that have died. Well, if I’m fair, I just plain don’t know a whole lot of people! 😉 To answer this question, I’m sticking with people that are somehow related to me because I’m sure there are tons of other people that would be fascinating to bring back, but there’s no real direct connection to my life. Having said that, I’ve had a real interest in genealogy and have done a lot of research on my family so there are tons of those characters that I would love to bring back to learn more about. First that comes to mind is my great-grandfather who hung himself in a state mental hospital. Morbid I suppose, but I feel a weird connection to him – don’t read anything troubling into that. I’ve just always been very interested in him. He seemed to use the middle name “Emerson,” which I’ve always found interesting and wondered about. That’s actually where one of my cats’ names (Emerson of course 😉 ) came from. I’d also love to meet my great-grandfather’s mother who emigrated from Ireland. What a fascinating life I imagine! I would also love to talk to the Alaskan gold miner from England and his ex-wife to try and figure out what really happened there. Or the true story behind my grandmother’s bizarre family situation as a child. But all of that said, none of those people are who I would bring back. I would bring back my grandmother – my father’s mother, Lora.
Grandma Lora (as I knew her) was such a kind and caring woman. Very religious (unlike myself), but so tolerant and accepting despite her strict beliefs. I feel like I never really appreciated her. As a child, I was always somewhat shy around all of my grandparents. I lived far away from them and really didn’t know them very well. I was the kind of kid (still am to some extent) who was very quiet until I really knew someone well. Add to that the fact that I felt like I was never behaving as I was expected to behave around “strangers” and I just never knew how to act when in the presence of my grandmother. I realize now that I probably could have done pretty much anything I felt like around Grandma Lora and she would have loved me just the same. I’m not sure she ever knew that I moved in with a boy at 17, and though I doubt she would have approved, she wouldn’t have thought any less of me. She was proud of me. I was her only granddaughter and she was absolutely thrilled that I just existed. My blue hair wasn’t an issue. I don’t know if she knew about my tattoo (I added another one years after her death), but I’m sure she would have accepted it just the same. But somehow in my eyes, I always felt that I didn’t quite fit the “part” of a good granddaughter. It saddens me a bit that I never really got to know my grandmother and that she really never knew me.
In addition to just my own desire to know Grandma Lora, she was also a wealth of family stories that I would so love to know now. Apparently as a child, she only knew German until the 1st World War at which point they stopped speaking German real fast! Her baptism certificate is all in German with the old German script and I just find that fascinating. Her family moved from an apparently successful farm in Iowa to Canada because her father thought he could strike it rich there. They went from a very comfortable life to one where they essentially lived in a tiny beat up shack. Eventually they moved back to the US and her father opened a very small grocery store that my grandmother and her sister inherited when he died. In fact, he was ill while Grandma Lora was pregnant with my uncle, her 1st child, and there was some kind of fear about her being around him during that time so she didn’t get to see her father in his last days. That had to be so hard! But then there were many, many struggles in her life.
My grandmother, her sister, her husband, and my grandfather (who died before I was born and I would also love to have met! I always felt an attachment to him as well) all ran this eventually thriving store together. My dad has so many interesting stories from his childhood about the store. My grandmother worked there every day and took care of all the typical housewife chores of the time. Again, so hard!
At various points in time, my grandparents took in my grandfather’s mother and his brother at times when they couldn’t live by themselves. There were/are a lot of mental health issues on my grandfather’s side of the family and my grandmother didn’t balk at the stigma of it all. In fact, she had to deal with their care as my grandfather wouldn’t handle it himself. That had to be so difficult to deal with, not to mention understand in those days. As an adult, my dad finally realized that my grandmother had suffered with anxiety most of her life…much like me! I can’t imagine dealing with it and not being able to do anything about it, not to mention not really even knowing what it was!
Obviously there are plenty more things that I have heard about my grandmother and her life that I would love to know more about, but she’s gone now. She lived to be 93!!! She died when I was in college and from what I hear (I didn’t ever really speak with her, which saddens me now), she was so proud. I wish I could say I was greatly upset when she passed, but aside from being absurdly busy at the time, I never really knew her. That sounds so horrible, but it really is true. I rarely spoke to her unless I had to, and I probably saw her even less. For some reason, I just always felt restricted around her – as though I couldn’t be myself. I realize now that nothing could be further from the truth! My biggest problem was my fear of her religion I think. I just wanted (still don’t!) no part of organized religion, but I didn’t want to offend her. That was so stupid. In return for my fear of offending her, I just never let myself get to know her…or for her to really know me. So I wish I could bring my grandmother back so we could actually get to know one another.
Who would you bring back if you could and why? I’d love to hear and if you write a post like this as well, let me know because I’d love to read it! I hope this was an interesting glimpse at something other than beauty for a change. I should have another beauty review up on Friday, so I hope to see you back if not then, than for another of these random “prompt” posts! Thanks for stopping by!!!